I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
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