mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
