whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
