so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
