We're facebook friends in real life
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
