I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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