i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Randomize
