Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Randomize
