Sry I called you an 8
stop calling my apartment porn island.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize