He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
