Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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