My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize