party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Randomize