So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
