6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
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