For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
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