Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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