I wanna bring you to show and tell
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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