Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
