So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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