He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
