Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
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