He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
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