if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
