Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
