the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
