tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
No subtext here. People are naked.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
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