That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
