Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
