Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
