The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
