She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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