It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
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