Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
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