Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
