she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
