i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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