porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize
