I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
