Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
