K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
