How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
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