You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
