So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Randomize