Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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