there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize