I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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