What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize