don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Randomize
