Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
