white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize