Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
