worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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